Eclipsing the Pothead Perception: Reforming the Federalists

By S. Brook

“Don’t panic — it’s organic!”

That enlightening turn of phrase is an outrage to North American conservatives under pseudo conditions.

Notwithstanding, medical cannabis’ descent upon the continental west — with sparse but increasing state/provincial operations — has many surveying herbal relief as a certifiable alternative to prescription drugs.

Right-wing hypothesis and other fleeting barriers aside, winds of revolution are harmonizing enchanting hymns of a thriving humanity.

Next objective: The abatement of the 56,600 annual synthetic drug-induced funeral dirges. Ever on the rise, we must recast the staggering 7,600 deaths attributed to non-steroidal, over-the-counter items such as aspirin, Tylenol, and ibuprofen. Perhaps traditionalists would also like another glance at the 32,000 prescribed casual-ties; the 17,000 cold graves, a result of the — oops! — illicit pills and powders. Too many have lost loved ones to lab-fabricated or pharmaceutical compounds.

Even in-home pesticide treatments exterminate over 2,200 Americans/Canadians yearly, along with countless harmless garden spiders.

Sporting fewest fatalities and side effects, cannabis comes inherently with an overdose clause: You won’t. Period. Yet, as we pinch the delightfully fat cheeks of our zero death toll, diehards point a decrepit baton of scorn at an advancing medical cannabis exhibition. Conventional mindsets still scoff at notions of weed as an imminent AMA/FDA lexicon inclusion.

Moreover, systematic principle would onset misconcep-tion, tagging the death-exempt cannabis demonic Latin term marijuana. The judicial system, and ultimately the world at large, then criminalized an earth-given plant, surmising the impeccable seedling a narcotic.

Society also supported theories of eternal ban “con-firmed” via propaganda-based marijuana studies. Primarily fueling the ardent temperaments of the reac-tionaries was the ballyhooed claim — yawn — that one joint was the carcinogenic equal of 20 cigarettes. Nonetheless, more than 400,000 tobacco smokers died last year, while millions of cannabis users raided the fridge and merely dozed off.

Also in the interim of cigarette and drug corporation-established destruction, daily cannabis smokers graduat-ed university, played NBA-level basketball, maintained successful law firms, and lived functional lives — con-trary to our burnout reputation.

Ironically, many progressive-thinking federal officials have abandoned the drug-war mentality. California judges Elenor Schockett and Whitman Knapp say, “Legalize marijuana and all drugs; peace will follow.”

Statistics validate it. Ninety-nine percent of society would continue to let common sense usher it clear of hard drugs, even if cocaine were permissible. Prohibition so severe in the 21st century, federal, state, and provin-cial reformatory expenses/taxes would be reduced by 80 percent, with copious police officer and retailer fatalities avoided, if the US and Canada adopt Amsterdam-like drug liberties.

Still, conventional mentalities recall the original court inquest, condemnation, hence methodical social democ-racy as it gives medical cannabis the finger. “I’m tired of the lie,” asserts Gary Hughes, 55-year-old guitarist/com-poser for Southern Oregon rockers Mr. Hughes. “Every lifelong stoner in the West has faked ailment to obtain his/her medical marijuana card. Stubbed your toe? Good excuse to get high legally! Same ol’ gaunt-looking dopers; new scenario.” And Gary, like millions of other Oregon/US citizens, is a registered voter.

He also supports socially valid points. If you were antic-ipating full-blown Oregon dispensaries and California liquor store gram packs, maybe next time; the poorly informed majority defeated Measures 74 and 19, respec-tively, last November. Yeah, yeah, yeah….

We are on the edge of greatness, yet startlingly subordi-nate. Smackdown. Move on.

In seeking image re-evaluation, some appraise the cir-cumstances apart from the proverbial pothead illustra-tions. At stake is the psychedelic portion of the cannabis heritage, a Vietnam-era, LSD-congruent counterculture staple — a color-clash that opposes Utopian dreams of The American Way.

Cease or conceal the insurrections. “We downplay the stereotypical flowers, dope, and idealism division of cannabis,” Medford, Oregon’s Larry Wise II states. “Our clients have genuine health issues. Many have careers and want to focus on life’s realities. We don’t want to see people lost in a haze 24/7.” Yet cannabis will always be used recreationally.

Clinically safe, would it then be condoned, in conformi-ty’s eye, if utilized as a simple life enhancer? “Some clients claim it’s a good antidepressant, in exchange for say Zoloft or Prozac,” Wise continues. “But cannabis is tagged a depressant, and depression may never be added to the list of applicable illnesses.” It goes without saying.

Metabolism disorder also eludes the table of maladies. So mum’s the word when some Patient Services clients claim to experience weight loss, along with increased agility and energy, with the reduction of pharmaceuticals in favor of medical cannabis.

Direct, simplistic, status quo transformation is conceivable as well. “Do the research,” Larry insists. “The safety truths will be revealed. Medical cannabis is the anecdote for toxic prescription oppression. Read the side effects info on the most popular (key word) prescriptions. The fine print goes on for pages! Fact will subvert fallacy. Pill poppers are breaking their liver, kidneys, and cellular tissue — the human defense system! People are dying; pot smokers are not. It’s hardly nuclear science.”

Medical cannabis may additionally be the sole alternative to chemical drug allergies, alleviation of haphazard suf-fering for millions.

Sadly, until diehards examine the concrete advantages of medical cannabis, fragmented myth and erroneous retro-spects will thrust us to the posterior of many wisecracks. “After the last election, I was interviewed on a local radio station,” Patient Services director/advisor Cynthia Willis smiles bravely. “The DJ made incessant stoner jokes, deflecting serious medical cannabis topics. He twisted an adult conversation regarding vital health choices into an episode of Beavis and Butthead. One of our most con-siderable obstacles is transitioning locker room humor to boardroom value.” Yet Patient Services is quick to shrug off cynicism, choosing only to put positive energy into the progression of medical cannabis.

“We’ve put the client first,” Willis selflessly claims. “Patient Services is pro-active in finding grower/provider/caregiver accommodations for our peo-ple —and acts as arbitrator with the event of discord. We like to locate individualized programs, affordability, and accord for all parties involved. The stability of our med-ical cannabis community is a priority.” Regulating good balance and trust, Patient Services transcends OMMA requirements also with strain monitoring.

Solidifying virtue and erect posturing within the folds of the new medical cannabis industry, Cynthia is adamant about “end points,” to coin allergy-testing terminology. As an estimable alternative to mainstream remedies, conclusive and/or calming strains are vital for the immune dysfunctional. Strains acceptable to one patient may not be well received by universal sensitivities or hyperactivity.

The medical cannabis products that are right for you may not be based on aesthetic or aromatic quality. “It’s very important to take notes,” Willis stresses. “Keep a journal of how each strain makes you feel. New clients to cannabis, as a whole, are eager to learn, and their ability to differentiate is necessary for effective treatment.” Bottom line.

After all, once we convert even the ornery ol’ farts, they’ll want to know that if Train Wreck made them feel sketchy, Purple Candy may be just the … aaahhh.